Occams Tweezer

OK, Now That My Token "Godspeed" Post Is Out Of The Way.....

2005-08-30T14:41:00.000-04:00

What is wrong with you people?? I've spent a grand total of 11 days of my life in New Orleans and even I know what would happen if it took a direct hit from a hurricane. If you stayed in your home, you are a selfish ass and are putting the lives of first responders in danger. They have to risk their lives because you don't care enough about yours to heed a [b]mandatory[/b] evacuation notice.
I pray that no cop, EMT or fireman is hurt trying to rescue some thoughtless yahoo standing on the roof of his house. So if you're conceited enough to think that you can survive a hurricane, then at least have the common courtesy to NOT call for help when the water is rising around you.

Godspeed

2005-08-30T14:36:00.000-04:00

Our thoughts and prayers are with those of you living through Hurricane Katrina.

What If I would Have Told You Four Years Ago..

2005-03-07T08:47:00.000-05:00

..........that that Syria would withdraw from Lebanon?

..........that Saudi Arabia would hold municipal elections?

..........that Egypt would plan presidential elections?

..........that Palestine and Israel would have true detente?

..........that Iraq would hold free elections?

..........that Afghani women would vote in free elections?

..........that Libya would voluntarily give up its weapons program?

..........that Pakistan would be a key player in the war against Islamic terror?

..........that Iran was on the verge of a popular revolution?

To the consternation of those who for partisan purposes seek to minimize the importance of recent events, we are living in historic times with changes that were unimaginable only four short years ago. If it wasn't for the revolutionary global changes between 1980-1991, this era of blossoming democracy would be unprecented in modern history.
So we have to ask ourselves - if these changes are [i]really[/i] happening, was it all worth it? If the invasion of Iraq was the catalyst for all this, was it worth it?

Still In Despair Over The Election?

2004-11-09T07:21:00.000-05:00

For those of you despondant Democrats who simply wont be satiated by immigrating to Canada, might I suggest a more, ahem, permanent solution?

Please Help! I CANT Stop Reading Democratic Undergroud!!

2004-11-04T13:15:00.000-05:00

These people are just amazing to me and I absolutely canNOT stop reading their delusional diatribes. Are there honestly people like this?

"searching my spirit for "how I was feeling". I told others here awhile ago, HOW WILL I LOOK MY TEEN IN THE EYES? How will he ever believe in anything positive again.
We spent this entire year in full steam ahead working for Democracy and a brighter future. He got all enthused about it too. I was so proud of him. It looked like this election was the ticket to cause him to perk up and want to get involved more fully with life and educationl
FUCK YOU REPUBS AND WEAK KNEED DEMS for doing this to my family.
My teen said that if Bush won, he would go to jail instead of being drafted. Either way, his life is screwed behind that catch 22."

"There are organizations that can independently fight to find out about voter fraud. How much money does MoveOn still have? Could some lawyers get together and pool their pro-bono hours to fight this thing -- then KERRY isn't seen as the one fighting it, but more votes could still be found. Kerry conceding can be seen as the patriotic thing to do ... but others can keep fighting on in his name. He'll look good, and the fight will still go on!
If fraud is found (kicking out lots of fraudulent ballots or E-ballots) or if enough votes are found to trigger recounts in certain states, who knows?"

A majority of voters (and not all of them gay-hating, bible-thumping bigots) thought Bush was the better alternative. And the rest of the world is embracing that decision. The global markets soared as soon as the news hit. Terrorists in Fallujah have begun crapping themselves in anticipation of the city's liberation. Jobless claims are down.

In other words -

Get over it.

Waxing Poetic

2004-11-03T16:52:00.000-05:00

Ahhhhh, the sweet, sweet nectar of victory is in the air. It courses through my veins - warming my heart and tickling my loins. She's a tender, loving mistress that invades my soul and intoxicates my psyche. Rejoice, as I suckle at the bosom of triumphant success and conquest.
I shall savor each and every one of the next 2,217,600 minutes that the American people have bequeathed to each and every one of us.

And blessed are those that we have saved from themselves. May each of them come to experience the joy and relief that I have come to feel in the last 14 hours. May each of them be sustained in the sheltering womb of Mother Conservatism.

Raining In Northeast Ohio

2004-11-02T14:45:00.000-05:00

Whatever that means.

Speaking of Bloom County

2004-11-02T14:19:00.000-05:00

Im certain Berke Breathed wasnt thinking of Kerry when he penned this, but he should have been.

2004-11-02T14:06:00.000-05:00

Worked the phone banks at the local Republican HQ this weekend. Typical positive responses from the party faithful as well as the chronically undecided.
However, it was the call sheet from the "Belly of the Beast" that had me most surprised. This phone list, bequeathed to me due to my infectious optimism as well as my complete dearth of personal shame, contained the inhabitants of the most liberal precinct in my county (hint: home of a legendary radical 60's/70's college campus).
Anyhow, the callees not only refrained from issuing death threats and inferences to my mother's volcanic libido, but they also were suprisingly receptive to my conservative wiles. Positive responses that I'd think would be more at home on an early 80's Reaganesque campus rather than of hotly divided anti-Bush lair.

Oh Please Please Pretty Please

2004-11-02T10:09:00.000-05:00

I just hope they dont wimp out like they did in 2000.

I hear Qatar is lovely this time of year.

What's Another Word For "Thesaurus"?

2004-11-02T09:41:00.000-05:00

To break up the monotony of poll watching, I present to you.......

Steven Wright.

Why Didnt I Think Of This?

2004-11-02T08:57:00.000-05:00

From INDC Journal -

"But Kerry voters - I just noticed there's a West Wing marathon on TBS! All day long! Starting any minute now!

Don't miss a treasured moment of the passion, principle and drama as President Josiah Bartlett tackles the pressing liberal issues of the day and fights terrorists with both resolve and compassion! Will Leo and Josiah's poignant friendship survive under the strain of the Presidency? Will a nervous C.J. successfully parry the questions of a scandal-obsessed press? Will Josh and Donna's dedication guide the President to victory against his Republican challenger? Can Toby secure the crucial votes of the UN Security Council in their multilateral quest for peace in the Middle East?

Don't you dare miss a single second of the all-day West Wing marathon!

The rest of you - vote."

Classic misdirection!

Dumbest Idea In SD Campaign History

2004-11-02T08:41:00.000-05:00

You dont sue the other candidate. You leak the story to a well-placed source in the press. Innuendo and gossip will go a lot further without making you look like a whiny crybaby.
And why the need anyhow? His internal pollsters must be a lot worse than the other out there (Thune +2-3).

Regardless, this pansy-ass move just cost him the election.

Mass Confusion In My Sleepy Little Village

2004-11-02T08:08:00.000-05:00

Due to construction of a new village hall, the residents of Sleepy Village proper are voting in my usual polling place. Since its about the same size as a glorified men's room, there was a wee bit of confusion as to who sticks what in where (prom night, anyone?).
I drove up at 6:45AM and was greeted by a line of humanity about 50 souls long. Very unusual where I come from. My initial reaction was that these were the new registrants paid for by the NAACP with three vials of crack. But then I found out that there was a separate (and much shorter) line inside for my precinct. But not before I heard a middle-aged woman claim that the Republican poll watchers were intimidating Dems by asking for ID.
Anyway, I poked and prodded my good ol' reliable punch card and proceeded on my way.

Live-Blogging The Election

2004-11-01T15:55:00.000-05:00

I'll be live-blogging the election tomorrow including up-to-the-minute feedback from poll observers in Ohio and Colorado.
Dont think anything until I tell you what to think!!!

Kerry/Streisand Caught in Tryst! Bush To Name Kucinich Sec. of Peace!

2004-11-01T15:23:00.000-05:00

Im going to be up all night waiting for the other shoe to drop. Theres got to be an Octob...errrr...November Surprise. There just has to be.

Cheney is really a Automaton created in a joint venture between Halliburton, Enron and Microsoft!

Edwards - Im not just a spokesman for the Hair Club For Men, Im also a client!

Gov. McGreevy tells of his passionate nights with Laura Bush!

My Completely Reliably Infallible Electoral Prediction

2004-11-01T14:55:00.000-05:00

Bush - 315 EV's
Kerry - 223 EV's
Bush wins outside the MoL (Margin of Litigation).

Bush wins OH, PA, FL, IA, HI and WI.

Speaking of the National Review.......

2004-10-27T13:49:00.000-04:00

As much as I really enjoy The Corner, I dont know if I can continue patronizing their little slice of the web. How do they expect me to maintain any sense of respect when their overwhelming fave beers are Bud, Corona and Guinness? Come on, folks. Thats like saying your favorite restaurants are McDonalds, Taco Johns and Applebees.
Though I applaud the picks of Cliff May (Fat Tire, a New Belgium classic) and Mac Owens (the always reliable Sam Adams and Sierra Nevada Pale Ale), the rest of the picks are just plain inexcusable.

Some recommendations? How about an All-Swing State list?
Iowa - Simpatico Lager
Ohio - Gotta go with Burning River Pale Ale from the fantastic Great Lakes Brewing Co.
Colorado - Wynkoops Captain Hickenlooper's Flying Artillery Ale
Florida - Anything from the Ybor City Brewing Company

Poseurs!!

Kerry Takes His Eye Off The Ball

2004-10-27T13:31:00.000-04:00

OK, now this KerrySpot pic really ticks me off! As a guy who used to play a little ball himself, Kerry's attempt here is just pathetic.
Nevermind the closed eyes not even looking in the general direction of the ball, just look at his hand position! His pinkies arent touching like they should be, his fingers arent parallel and his arms arent fully extended.
If I tried to haul in a pass like that, my coach would STILL have me running laps!

And this guy wants to be president???

October Surprise - Little Rock Style

2004-10-25T15:22:00.000-04:00

Does anyone here actually believe that Hillary wants John Kerry to win 8 days from now? No way. Uh-uh.
So, although the polls have Bush up +3, you just know that Hillary's sweatin' it up a bit. A Kerry win pushes her window back to 2012.
What lengths would HRC go toward clearing up the Dem ticket for '08? What dirt can she get on JFK II and leak it to some friendly press all anonymous-like?

There will be a crap-bomb dropped on Bush or Kerry sometime in the next week. The real story wont be what the bomb is, but rather WHO dropped it. If it comes via a Lanny Davis/Bruce Lindsey press flak, things will get real interesting real fast.

Edited To Add -

To those who are going to email insults citing Bill Clinton's stump for Kerry, I respond with this -

He's stumping in Philly = a non-swing town in a non-swing state. A rope line at a rotary club in Des Moines would have a bigger impact on the election.

Hate Mail Of The Week

2004-10-06T16:37:00.000-04:00

"What kind of name is Occams Tweezer? I don't get it. Is that suppose to be some kind of joke.
Anyway your blog show you to be what you are, a tool for the right wingnuts that are driving this country into the ground. Your jokes aren't funny and show you how dumb you are.
Dumbasses like you make me glad I'm voting for Kerrey(sic)"

Name Deleted

Um, does he know that Bob KerrEy is not running this year or is it just wishful thinking on his part?

Bush's Speech & A Preview Of The Next Debate

2004-10-06T16:19:00.000-04:00

Here

Im Absolutely Shocked! Shocked, I Say!

2004-10-06T15:50:00.000-04:00

I posted just two comments on the Kerry Campaign Blog before I was booted.
My first post called into question Kerry's true commitment to fighting non-al Qaeda terror cells. It lasted about 30 seconds before it was deleted.
The second post countered an allegation of Republican voter fraud in Michigan with examples of flagrant Democratic voter fraud in Florida, South Dakota, Michigan, Ohio, New York, et al. That post lasted less than 2 minutes.

I wasnt disrespectful nor was I insulting. But I was ejected nonetheless.

Yet this reasoned posted (by Teachers For Kerry) was allowed to stay -
"As I was watching the debate last night, I found myself, as I always do while watching Dick Cheney, waiting for the filthy, slimy alien creature to burst out of his chest"

And here I thought the official blog of the John Kerry campaign would be a haven for rational political debate and cogent discussions of topical issues.

2004-10-06T13:38:00.000-04:00

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Did He Just Say What I Think He Said?

2004-10-06T13:28:00.000-04:00

In the middle of this otherwise inconsequential article is a stunner of a quote -

John Kerry - "Osama bin Laden should have been the complete focus of our effort in the war on terror."

That is so completely and utterly naive as to defy adequate superlatives. Does the junior Senator actually believe that Al Qaeda is the only radical Islamist faction plotting against us? Does he somehow believe that if we kill bin Laden, the rest of the terror types will just wilt away?

This catastrophically obtuse perspective represents a tremendous philosophical chasm between those dealing with real world implications of global terror and those, like Senators Kerry and Edwards, who are perpetually living in a pre-September 11th world. That perspective steadfastly refuses to acknowledge the cold hard truth that radical Islamic terror is a pervasive force that must be defeated wherever and whenever it rears its head. Global terror is not just Al Qaeda. The Global War on Terror CANNOT be just against al Qaeda.